Homosexuality

Okay, I'm taking this opportunity to respond to a few posts I've received before I start telling y'all about my week.

Nick said, "i bet you cant predict the mood im in when i say that i am feeling...umm....brown..yea thats it--Nick (not the nick that your always talking about that i think is me because my name is nick)yea". Well, Nick... brown's a tough one. It has so many different interpretations. You could be feeling plain, bored, and not very special. You could be feeling that you'd match very well with pink. You could be feeling like you're a a blend of many different emotions, confused about your origins and who you really are. I think it's the last one. Am I right? Am I right?

Anonymous, you don't have to wait any longer. Here I am to answer all of your meandering questions. You said, "i have a quetsion. are you a lesbian. i dont have anything against it. im just wondering. when are you gona come out of the closet. post the ansswer in ur next blog. i shall be waiting". Except without the periods, because Anonymous used spaces instead, and they don't show up when you paste it into your blog. Oh, and Anonymous, you spelt 'question' wrong. And didn't use question marks. Tsk tsk.

When I read your post, I smiled. God, I love people. I hate humanity, but I love people. I mean, so many different people with different opinions and different personalities and it's all so FUNNY!

Anyway, your first question was if I am a Lesbian. On this front, I'm not really sure. I mean, I haven't tried making out with any girls yet. When I do, I'll be sure to post whether I liked it or not. Mmmkay? I hope your curiosity was satisfied on that point. You then asked when I'm going to come out of the closet. Now, that question makes it seem like you already think I am a Lesbian. Hmmm. Not really much of a question there, then, is there? So I guess in your eyes, I'm a Lesbian. Go figure. And here I was being all touch because you bothered to ask before discriminating. ::wipes tears from eyes::

Alright, dirty business over with. God, why is the whole Lesbian thing re-surfacing again? This is ridiculous.

Eventful week. I played hooky on Thursday because it was Steve's birthday. Huzzah, huzzah. And he gave us his wishlist Tuesday night. What a... I'm trying to find a really stupid elementary school insult. Oh, what a buttsniffer! Goodness. I had already gotten him two things on his wishlist, though, because I friggin pwn like that. The Forty-Year-Old Virgin and The Wedding Crashers. Two really, really good, funny movies. I love em. I wish I could give them kisses and hugs. Mmm-mmm, good.

So Steve now officially has his permit. Eeek. He can drive wherever he wants if his mommy his with him. Coincidentally, his mommy is also my mommy. Small world. So if I want my mom to drive me some place, and my brother needs to go there too, he's driving. Not good.

Tonight, Nick and Steve and Dane are going to a sweet sixteen. Actually, Corinne is too. Shocker. Not the same one, though. Sososo Hayden is coming over and we're going to yay around with my paints and stuff.

Oh, I suck at a painting, so I just do abstract, and yesterday I made the most awesomest ever painting. I was using a sheet of wax paper to mix my red, blue, and white to make a purple-ish color for the shell of the ammonite I had to sculpt for school. After I finished painting it, I started pressing the wax paper all over this sheet of paper, and it looks awesome. I mean, really good. Like really really good. All red, white, and blue, and patriotic.

Yesterday, 19 kids in our grade got to go to Career Day at NYIT. Me, Cori, Danny, Noel, Nick, John U, Rachel, Lindsay, Will, and other people that I don't remember. It was... informative. I chose Finance (because of the whole drumset-saving-up-for thing) and Education (for the whole psychotherapist or whatev thing). Informative, yes. But in the Career Games, I won this canvas bag. It was the best one there, and there was only one of them, and I'm so nice, I put a yellow ribbon on it and gave it to my mummy.

Oh, and we went to Moe's for lunch, and Noel spilled a cup of fruit punch all over the front of Danny's pants (bramd-new khakis!). It was sooo funny. We all made fun of him, I offered him a pad, it was a good time. And Moe's is really good. I should get paid for saying that.

I can't believe Danny is going out with Gabby (Gabbi? Gabbie? Gabbey?). She'll probably end up reading this, but I really don't like her. She also says I'm a Lesbian. Yeah, she's one of those. Maybe I just don't know her well enough, but Danny keeps telling me that she hates me back, but we should be friends, and she's really nice, etc. Don't like her. Uh-uh. Oh, and she doesn't even like to see Danny and me and Corinne walking together. We were walking down the hallway, and he sees her coming towards us, and he goes, "Uh-oh, I can't walk with you," and moves to the other side of the hall.

I'm probably leaving something out, but my computer is seriously lagging, and I don't have the patience to keep going.

Eggs

I learned something very interesting in Spanish today. One of the homework questions was to translate 'the small balls', so we got on the ::ahem:: interesting topic of male reproductive organs. (Miss Rose is the best.) She explained to us that how we connect the nouns 'balls' and 'nuts' to mean testes, in Spanish they use 'eggs'. I dunno why, but they do. So be careful talking about breakfast foods. "I'll have the big eggs." "I only want the white stuff inside." "Crack those eggs!" And the guys flinch.

There was the dumb DNA thing field trip today. We're making bacteria glow! And I don't really care! No, it was pretty interesting. The pipettors or whatever they were called were really fun, especially when you shot the tips off. There were sterile tips, see, to put on it, and when you pushed a button they... well, they flew, man, they flew.

Jess got a new cell phone, evidently. Just thought I'd tell y'all about Jess's purchases. Um... yeah. ::ducks head::

AND NOW ON TO MY PURCHASES!!! Steve had to go to Kohl's after the orthodontist appointment (six more weeks!), and so I literally annialated the store. And that is most definitely not how you spell 'annialated'. Whatev. "Turn to Stone" by Electric Light Orchestra. Good song. Yeah, anyway, I ended up with this black lace top that my mom said made me look like a French hooker, an adorable little short-sleeve blue-and-green striped blazer which had really poofy shoulders, a pearl bracelet with black accents that I had nothing to wear with, a green flowy-type top with pearl buttons that I was too tired to try on, camo cargo capris that were definitely not cut right for me, a white headband that made me look like Heidi, black fishnets that my mom said made me look like a French hooker, and THIS REALLY SUPER-DUPER AWESOME SWEATER THAT HAD A SCREWED-UP ZIPPER SO I GOT ANOTHER ONE AND IT WAS ON SALE AND IT'S REALLY SUPER-DUPER AND AWESOME. Oh, and another tube of liquid eyeliner because I lost my last one. So I (when I say 'I', I mean Mom) bought me two things: eyeliner and THIS REALLY SUPER-DUPER AWESOME SWEATER THAT HAD A SCREWED-UP ZIPPER SO I GOT ANOTHER ONE AND IT WAS ON SALE AND IT'S REALLY SUPER-DUPER AND AWESOME.

I mean, it's awesome. Green with blue argyle on the three-quarter length sleeves and it's SO AWESOME. Sick, ill, rad, knarly, whatev.

I think I'm going to be a psychologist, psychiatrist, psychotherapist, whatev. I want to talk to people and help people with their problems, because I've got the illy skillys to do that. I mean, Corinne told me (when I asked what color she felt) that she felt mint green, and I immediately accurately predicted her mood! And Jess, after I reminded her to, commended me on how well I talk to her and how good I make her feel.

I friggin pwn.

Like that shirt I saw on ALLOY and love love love: "Note to Self: I'm Rad."

PIPPIN, HUZZAH!!!

Oh my goodness. "Pippin" is so good. My brother's an idiot. In the war scene. God. But it's still really, really good. And that sixth grader who plays Theo is adorable! Mitch. And Hayden and him are so cute together. Mmmm, I want to squeeze him.

So today, Sunday, is the last night of the musical. The last two nights were so good! They evened out, though, because Billy stumbled over a few lines last night and Brian did Friday night. Billy's part is so not the right key for him, but he did really, really well. And these people don't even know who I am. I know who they are. That's what I get for having an older brother.

Last night was our night. The one we Tachters, Ways, and Promaneks have every year. Last night was also the cast party, so Steve and Dane didn't come back to the Tachter/Promanek place to party. First, though, we did not go to the Adirondack Grill. We went to the Laguna Grill. Where I had Chipotle BBQ Chicken. Which I did not finish. Because it was gargantuan. If that's a word.

The Larsons, a friend of the Tachter/Promaneks, joined us for dinner, although Bryce (I did not spell that right) and his girlfriend Melissa (I think) didn't go to the play afterwards. They should be shot. Who would miss out on that willingly?

So there was a fifth grader (I think), Abe, who is going to be a hottie when he grows up. And he's so sweet and nice. I want to give him hugglies, but I think that would freak him out. Whatev.

Nick started it. He asked for a pen from me, so I dug through my entire huge bag to find him a pen so he could draw the Aquateen Hunger Force characters on his napkin. Hayden, Abe, and I watched him for a few minutes before Hayden found a pen in her bag and stared doing quadratic formulas on her napkin. It was really odd. Then Abe gave in to the fad and found a pen and started to make a really complicated maze. I was the last to fold, but eventually I cursed at my bag and searched with a flashlight for a few minutes before I found a pen for myself.

I drew my infamous kitty, a drumset, and a single eye and a nose. And I wrote some of the lyrics to "Saddest Girl Story" by The Starting Line and "Sic Transit Gloria... Glory Fades" by Brand New on it. And I wrote four lines on it that I made up. Which I forgot. But I'll remember.

Oh, and me and Hayden got up and danced in the corner of the restaurant to the salsa music. Actually, we did really bad '80's dancing, and turned around to see everybody at the table staring at us. It was pretty funnny. I motioned for Nick to come join us, but he chickened out. Boo, Nick.

When we were at the play, we were waiting for it to start. Alicia sat to the right of me, Sophia to the left, Corinne to the left of her, Hayden to the left of her, Abe to the left of her, Nick to the left of him, Jen to the left of him, Mom to the left of her, and Paula to the left of her. So I had Alicia start a Hug Chain, up until Mom broke it because she had no idea what she was doing.

And I'm going to shoot Jess. I want her to take me skiing with her family. Not just any time, however. ::cough::Billy::cough:: You're dead, Jess.

Steve and Dane were at the cast party, and Jen was pooped, so Chip drove Jen home while Mom, Bryn, Hayden, April, Erin, Nick, and I danced in the living room. Nick even admitted that he had fun, even though he wasn't allowed to go to the party. And then we shuffled around the living room not picking up our feet to create a static electricity. Erin kept shocking me in the forehead until I got a massive headache. I could feel the brain cells dying.

That hurt.

And then I was amazed by Nick's ability to catch a wadded-up gum wrapper while laying on the floor, because when I lay down my depth perception is completely out of whack. So I layed, lied, whatev, down next to him and tried to catch my hair clip when I threw it up. And I didn't. And that hurts considerably more than a gum wrapper when it hits you on the head.

OHOHOHOHOHOHOH. HAYDEN'S GOING TO MURDER ME FOR WRITING THIS, BUT IF YOU'RE INTERESTED IN EXPOSING HAYDEN, APRIL, AND ERIN AT THEIR SENIOR PROM/GRADUATION, JOIN ME AND NICK IN THE QUEST TO GET THE ADVENTURELAND TAPE. IT'S SO DAMN FUNNY. IM ME FOR FURTHER INFORMATION.

Nick and I laughed so hard. They're such little idiots. They were so cute, though. I'll give you three words: dancing and Britney Spears. Nuff said. Hehe.

Nick and I had an in-depth conversation last night as he read Seveteen magazine and I read my dumb fifth-grade stories. We talked about love. I said it was beautiful, but it wasn't worth it. And he was pretty silent the whole time. I think. I don't really remember. It wasn't all that in-depth.

Whatev. I'm tired. We only stayed up until like 2am this morning. I was shocked. We left the Tachter/Promaneks at 1. AT 1. D'you know how early that is? Dumb parents, getting tired. Gosh. I could've danced the night away.

Spare a little sunshine.

It must be so fun to have Jackie's part. Jeez. Except I would look really bad doing it. Whatev. I can still do it in my room with the door shut. So shoot me.

Eh... I'm done. And hungry.

Pippin, Huzzah!

Huzzah! Tonight Steve is playing his eeny-weeny insignificant role in "Pippin"! Actually, it's a pretty good role for a sophomore. And I get to watch him! And watch all the ninth graders swoon over him. And some of the eight graders, too... you know who you are. I mean, ick. He's my brother. Sophia's coming tonight, and of course Hayden's going every night with me to support Dane. Huzzah for brothers! Tomorrow I'm giving Corinne a ride, oh, and tonight's picture night. So I'll be there until like midnight taking bad pictures of the cast and crew.

Tomorrow we're having our annual Tachter, Way, and Promanek after-show party. Huzzah for parties! Me and Hayden want to toga it up, but we're finding it hard to find other people willing to do so. I mean, it's not that cold in March.

And tomorrow Nick and Jen are coming to watch Steve and Dane. Huzzah! First, though, the non-performing people (namely: Nick, Jen, Bryn, Chip, Hayden, Mom, me) are going to the Adirondack Grill or whatever it's called. Where we went last year.

Dad's coming tonight and doing his part. So I'll be sitting with Mom and Dad. This is the family night. The other nights I can sit wherever I want, but tonight I have to sit with Mommy and Daddy. Huzzah. (Note the lack of exclamation points there.)

Well, I had my meeting with the guidance counselor to discuss my schedule. I'm not going to do AP next year, because I'll graduate with more history credits than I need. That would be terrible. I like history and all, but school history I can do without it. How it's taught is so dreary.

Wow, I'm actually really tired. I didn't even stay yup late last night. In fact, I went to bed really early. Like 8:30. I feel like swearing at people in Swedish. Which is just about the funnest thing you can do.

Except for animate things in Geometer's Sketchpad. And draw things like Sophia with teeth on her chest.

I'm kind of disappointed. I had an inordinate amount of donations just pouring in at first. It's slowed to a complete halt. Um... hello? Where are the donations I forced- I mean, asked- you to give? Hmmm?

Okay, my computer is having a seizure, so with these words, I'm out:

To me, love is like a merry-go-round. Stay on too long and I'll throw up.

I Don't Wanna Be a Fool in This Game for Two

My title is from a Backstreet Boys song. I think I'm losing it.

I might be bipolar. I have two extreme moods. One: I'm really, really happy, and do the oddest things, like give Corinne lettuce, not understand jokes, and tell people they killed JFK. And sing musicals at lunch. And put chicken patties down Cori's underwear. And spell out naughty words in sign language during tests. And... I'll stop.

Then my other mood has me swearing, angry, crying until two o'clock in the morning. Hating everything: life, guys, the world.

My cat is the plague of my life. Yet again, I'm kneeling on the floor because she decided to stretch out on the chair I was sitting on. And she has claws and teeth, whereas I don't. Who would win a battle, d'you think? I know.

Nick Pa. and I had a really productive conversation on the bus. He officially hates Nick Pr., because evidently he stole his name. Um, hello? My Nick is sixteen. You're... what? Thirteen? Fourteen? Whatev.

I am really hungry. I've barely eaten anything all week, and absolutely nothing fatty or bad for me. I would love a cookie right now (they look so good), but I already had syrup with my waffles this morning, and that's too much sugar already. Oh, damn cookies. It hurts to look at them. I'll probably end up having one. Or two. Or three.

I yelled at Danny today and told him that he killed JFK because he wouldn't let me play with his skateboard, and what he yelled back got me really confused until Cori explained it. He said, "That's lamer than FDR's legs." I am an idiot. No, really, I am. And the oven beeped. Meaning it's reached 300 degrees.

The math assessment, speaking of degrees, was incredibly easy. In explaining an answer, I wrote 'axises' and I don't think that's a word, but this is a math test, not English, and it shouldn't count.

I spent all day today trying to make Cori's arm go numb. Slapping it. Hitting it. But with love. I would never hurt her. I hit her because I love her, right, babe?

Math today was spent in the FLART Lab. Foreign Language and Art Lab. The computer room. Whatever you want to call it. We played with Geometer's Sketchpad and animated stuff. It was so funny! This quadrilateral I set to having one point dance about looked incredibly like an inchworm. Hmmm. Could be a conspiracy.

Madeliene's cat still hasn't found a home. She and her daughters, Emma and Sarah, are moving back to Ireland in a month or two or three or whaev, and they have to find a home for their 15-year-old cat. She'll probably end up living with us, but she's been by herself all her life, so Murphy would probably freak her out. And Trouble would probably eat her. And Goober would sit there, twitching his little nose and hopping about his cage. Until we let him out, and then Madeliene's cat would eat him.

It's a cat eat cat eat rabbit world out there.

Sophia sent me a song a few weeks back, "Sic Transit Gloria... Glory Fades" by Brand New, and it's so frickin frackin good, I could just listen to it over and over. If I didn't have a major headache right now that is. Other times, I do just listen to it over and over. Go figure.

Hookd on Fonikks Wurked for Me

I always fall for the wrong guy. I was trying really hard to convince myself that I didn't love him anymore, but you know what? Thinking of him promising to change... thinking of him wrapping his arms around me... thinking of him kissing her... it all hurts so bad, and I know that I'm just lying to myself. Maybe I'm supposed to learn from this. You know, like Fate. And maybe I'll never get over him, but maybe he'll always be the standard for how I measure guys. If they're as good-looking as him, I'll be lucky. If they act like him, I'll be unlucky. And in love.

Damn falling for bad guys. Damn, damn, damn.

Tech was fun. Cori, Ali, and I watched Nick Pa. hammer his clock together. It was so funny. At one point, he stopped hammering, and just turned the hammer over and over in his hands, looking at it intently. He was whistling, I think, but at the distance we were at we couldn't hear it, and he looked like he was fascinated. It was priceless, and totally supports my theory that Nick's a Neanderthal. Sorry, Nick. I love you.

In science, Teach went psycho on Danny and I. I asked Danny later what he did, but he swears he did nothing. Hmmm. Anyway, supposedly Danny wasn't paying attention sitting next to me, and Teach freaked out on him and told him that she'd already told him not to sit there. Ummm, hello? You PUT him there. She moved him next to Sam, yelled at us both, and then returned fuming to writing notes. Whatev. We'll probably still sit together tomorrow.

Andrew wasn't in school today. Danny and I had to play together in band all day. ANDREW PLEASE COME BACK!!! I swear, that boy's going to give me a nervous twitch. Always poking me and stuff... Danny, Nick Pr. and Steve don't approve. Cool it. They'll go kung-fu on your rear end.

Math assessment tests tomorrow and Thursday. Eeep. It looks easy, though. I mean, how difficult can it be? It's on stuff that the Regents class is taking, and we've done that last year or so, so it should be good. I hope.

Lunch is always fun. Today I tried to stick Jess's orange peels down my bra to make me smell nice. I gave a dollar to Danny. Sorry, Holden, that was my last dollar before saving up.

I want to buy a new drum set. Andrew laughed when I told him the condition that my old one's in. I pouted. Humph. He suggested buying a new one. I agreed. So now I'm saving up my money until I can afford a $500 drum set. Huzzah. I haven't practiced in like two years because my dumb old one fell apart. I'm really anxious to get back on the set, and I don't want to do it in school because I'm so rusty.

I'm angry with Patrick. Grrr, Patrick. Me and Heather shalst hurt him badly. He doesn't care about the animals. He only cares about the animals. Which one is it? Actually, he only cares about the humans. Patrick, not a single humane organization receives federal funding. And how many organizations are there to help poor children and citizens? How many are nice and cozy in their cushy, government-smiled-upon spot? A whole lot, Pat. A whole lot.

I really like reading comments, folks. Write em. Write whatev. I don't care. Curse me off. It amuses me for about three minutes and twenty-six seconds. And believe me, that's long for somebody like me.

I'm revising what I said in the first paragraph. I can't love him anymore. Not if it will keep hurting me. Not if it will take control of my life. Not if I won't let him see me cry. And the tears keep coming as I write this. Oh, don't you understand how it is that you hurt me? I can't do anything without seeing his face. Please, just leave me alone. I don't want you here. I don't want to be just friends. I don't want to feel like an intruder into your life.

I don't want to cry anymore.

https://www.kintera.org/faf/donorReg/donorPledge.asp?ievent=161631&lis=0&kntae161631=EF7E933EFD0F46EBAE13EA8A16C455F5&supId=121676012

See that really long link up there? That one? That's the link to my Relay for Life page, where you can make a donation. Please do so. Or tell your parents to do so, since you need a credit card number. Thanks.

I don't know where the title came from. So don't ask.

Well, since my iPod would not play my music, and made a really annoying high-pitched humming noise when I tried to force it to, I got a new one. And spent all yesterday night not doing homework (surprising, eh?) and trying to figure out how to make my computer recognize it. So I plug it into my computer today, you know, for sh-ts and giggles, and a screen pops up asking me to name my iPod. Which I did. "Banany". YAY I HAVE AN iPOD AGAIN!

Sooo, yesterday it seems like Bradley made a doody on the gym floor. I feel bad for him. But ick. Icky ick ick. I mean, honestly ... very icky. ::shudders::

So, I was riding the bus home today, and I hear Adam talking to Dana behind me. Adam: "CC doesn't believe in God." Dana: "CC's a LESBIAN." Adam: "CC says that everybody is a little bit bi." Dana: "She's not bi, she's a LESBIAN." And that's all I remember, but there was more stuff, but then they heard giggles and realized I was sitting right in front of them. Honestly, I NEVER giggle.

All day today in math I was coughing. Hack hack hack. And then my nose started running. Dribble dribble dribble. And the phone's ringing. But that didn't happen in math, and it's a sales call, so I'm not a'going to pick it up.

I'm taking a page out of Alicia's family's book by litterbox-training Goober (my bun). I read that rabbits are naturally very clean creatures, like cats, and they'll take to a litterbox like a fat kid to a cupcake. So I stuck some tupperware in Goober's cage with cat litter in it and he made all of his little poops in it. It worked! Aha! Kind of shocking, actually. But now he likes to sit in it and never goes anywhere else in cage.

Monday, when I stayed home from school with my illness, I took Goober outside on his leash and let him dig up my mom's flowers and he and Murphy (my hound) ended up cuddling on Murph's bed. Murphy usually goes crazy when he sees Goober outside of a cage, licking him and nibbling on him - LOVE NIBBLES, NOT FOOD NIBBLES. It was so cute, Goob just hopped up into the space between Murphy's folded back leg and his stomach. Oh, by the way, Murphy was laying down. And so Murphy looks up, all surprised, gives Goober a nudge with his nose, and then lays his head back down. It was adorable.

You know what, I love Stephen Lynch. Have you ever heard him? He's a "mild-mannered singing comedian by day", which he calls himself in the segment called "Superhero". Seriously, download some of his songs, or mooch off me. They're awesome, but I can't think of a single one that isn't dirty, so don't listen to them with your parents arounds. I know my mom's reading this, so, Mom, none of this is true. It is all a lie.

Yesterday our table was in a weird spot at lunch. I did not like it. No I did not. So I ate sitting on the counter by the windows. Me and Corinne were Puerto Rico. Figure it out.

Oh, I have a really funny riddle. IM me if you want to hear it.

Today, my mom put a sticker on my lunch bag that said "Cutest Kid" which Cori promptly put on my forehead after she collided with both Jess and Bradley, although not at the same time. In Spanish, Mike was ripping it off to put on Henry, and it ripped at "Cut". Not kidding. I thought that was so deliciously emo, so I stuck it on my wrist. "Cutting for Dummies." Shows you exactly where to do it.

Well, I'm hungry, because the only thing I had for lunch was an apple, so I'm going to eat cereal or something. Urg, hunger is present.

I'll chat you up some other time.


Just kidding.


Not reallly.

Gitchy-gitchy-cow-ow Gitchy-cow-ow

I feel like a bucket of fecal matter. My nose is all stuffy and I can't breathe out of it, and it runs and I sneeze and gross germy things are all over every single tissue in the house. My throat hurts and when I talk it sounds like somebody is sawing down a tree. All scritchy-scratchy, you know? Sinus headaches pain me constantly. And on top of it all, my skin is dry and my lips are chapped. Huzzah.

And my family is in tears. As I write this, my brother sits on the stairs with his head in his arms and my mom bustles around in the kitchen looking at the floor, and I'm the only one not yelling. Baaaaad karma.

For those of you who didn't go, Mitch Madness was slamming, and so was Sr. St. Denis. I hope that he never gets my screen name, because he is quite a looker. Meow. Mr. LoGerfo and Mr. Labansky were hitting it in volleyball, and, in LoLo's case, baksetball. There WAS a catch, though. Mr. Lee wasn't there! He was supposed to shoot some hoops, and the damn man was not there. Me and my posse were so very disappointed. We'll have to give him a talking-to.

Yesterday I watched The Titanic and had two epiphanies through my tears (so damn sad) which some of my friends should think about. Ahem. 1) Despite all the hurt and pain, when death is inevitable, you'd rather have life all over again. 2) It's foolish to choose death for yourself when so many don't have a choice.

I've mulled over this for a while, but I've decided that I'm going to express EVERYTHING in this blog. Everything I feel, even things about my friends that they might not appreciate. I just want to say before I continue that I love all of my friends, although they have their flaws, and I support them in everything that they do. I have very many moods, and sometimes I say things that I really shouldn't. But I love y'all. You be's my homeslices. ::hugs all friends:: So, here goes.

Alicia ... please don't hurt me, babe. I love you lots and lots, but you are just TOO "nice". You undo fun. For example, when Matt hid Jess's bag on top of the safety blanket in Ms. Roger's room, she didn't even notice. Of COURSE we wouldn't have let her leave without it, you should know us better than that. But you have to go over, pull it down, and place it next to her. She never even noticed it was gone. When Matt and I protested against your kill-joy-ish nature, you said, "It's being NICE." No, it's being obnoxious and boring. Lighten UP. Have FUN. Laugh at yourself. Laugh with others. Trust your friends to never purposely hurt you or each other. Trust ME. It's not mean to pull pranks, honey. It's not mean to hide your binder under John's at lunch. I wouldn't let you leave it, and it's not as if I'm keeping you from it when you find it. Just ... chillax.

And, Jess, please be strong. I love you, and I hope you don't get angry with me, but you're being weak and vulnerable. I know you don't like to be that way, but I'm trying to help you get stronger and you refuse to assist my cause. If you don't do something to change the life that you hate living, I'm going to. I don't care what you say, how hard you beg, but if you're going to live life miserably, I'm not going to let it happen. I WILL do things that you don't want me to do. It's not a threat, it's one of those "tough love" theories Mrs. Beers goes on about. ::hugglies::

Sophia ... I won't get into it. THAT, for one thing, is much too personal. I'll just say that I agree with Eerik. With EVERYTHING he says, in accordance to this. I don't care if you say it's not my business. I want to help you ... I hate not being able to do anything.

Whenever I post, I always end up remembering more stuff about the days that have passed, but I vowed to never go back and write more stuff. So the only way you'll get to know more about me is to talk to me ... hmmmm, interesting. Verbal communication.

JUST NOT OVER THE PHONE. Eeeeg, phones. I have a fear of talking on the phone. I don't even talk to my grandparents in Sweden on the phone. I refuse. I pretend to be asleep or lock myself in the bathroom, or run upstairs and hide under my covers and scream if anybody brings the phone near me.

Other odd fears I have ... I have a fear of newspaper material. I HATE how it feels. I can't feel it. Sometimes, when we're on road trips, Steve will be reading the paper and then he'll shove it at me and I'll scream and kick and hit and make him get away from me. Which is real hassle when I try to clean Goober's cage, because we line the bottom with newspaper. Eeeug.

I also find automatic and revolving doors frightful. An automatic door shut on me once, and revolving doors ... just ugh. How are you supposed to jump into a small triangular space while it's MOVING??? Beats me. If you have any tips, post a comment.

Actually, once I get into the revolving door, I like to go around and around, mainly because I can't get out. Hehe.

Chickens. No chickens. Uh-uh. Once, when I was a tike, I was at a farm in Sweden for a party, and this old man, a friend of my morfar's, was giving us a tour of all the animals, and I typically, being young and impressable, wanted to pet all of the 'aminals'. I DO remember that a calf sneezed on my brother. Hehe. Yeah, so, the ole man introduced us to the chickens in their wire cages next to the barn, and I stick my finger in the cage, and the possessed little thing bit me! Or pecked me, whatev. But I started bleeding and crying and ran back to my mommy, who held me close to her hip and patted my wet hair while still chatting with relatives and friends she hadn't seen in years.'

Since I'm writing this during commercials between the Oscars, I'm going to leave you with the remnants of the image of the bloody tip of my finger laying in the bottom of a chicken's cage as it pecks the flesh off it.

Just kidding.